The Forty Files

For the last couple of summers, our schedules have been pretty demanding, both on the professional and personal fronts. It’s made finding the time and space for a true summer escape challenging. And yet, I’m learning—both from my children and through my own lived experiences—that what matters most isn’t necessarily where you go or how much you manage to fit in. It’s the quality of the time you spend together.

I grew up in Buffalo, New York, so this summer we found ourselves returning to the Queen City for a visit with family and, perhaps just as importantly, a little respite. There is something comforting about returning to a place that already knows you. Familiar streets. Familiar faces. Old memories layered onto new ones. It’s a different kind of travel when you’re returning to somewhere that is already part of your story.

My husband and I also managed to sneak away for a little getaway to Niagara-on-the-Lake, a quaint Ontario town that feels as though it exists just outside the rush of everyday life. Its charming streets, historic homes and unhurried pace offered exactly the kind of escape we needed. We wandered, we ate, we talked, and for a little while, there was nowhere else we needed to be.

And one word about Niagara-on-the-Lake for coffee connoisseurs: options. So many options. Truly, a caffeine crawl worthy of its own mention. I’ll give a particular shout-out to Il Gelato di Carlotta for an Americano and an affogato worthy of the detour.

When it came time for some quality family adventure, we used our passports to cross the border once again, this time for Niagara Falls. Whether riding a boat straight into the mist or simply standing alongside the Falls and taking in their incredible power, there is something undeniably special about being there.

But what I’ll remember most isn’t necessarily the view.

It’s the time.

The laughter. The conversations. The moments in between the plans. Watching my children experience something new. Being with my husband without the usual demands of work, schedules, carpools and obligations competing for our attention. Those are the pieces that make a trip feel like a real escape.

Maybe that’s what I’m learning in this season of life: genuine time is a luxury.

Not because it has to be expensive or elaborate, but because it can be so difficult to come by.

Sometimes it looks like returning to the city where I grew up. Sometimes it’s a coffee and an affogato in a little Ontario town. Sometimes it’s standing beside Niagara Falls, soaking wet and completely awestruck with the people I love most.

The setting can change. The itinerary can change. The distance traveled can change.

But the thing that matters remains the same: being present enough to actually experience the time we have together.

This summer, we found some of that.

Genuine time.

And I’m learning not to take it for granted.